Ball Essentials

Ok, ok, I know I'm a bad blogger. But I was inspired this morning for a new post.

It's Ball season here in the Army. Not sports balls, but dancing balls. Our Soldiers put on their dress uniforms, spouses and significant others put on their formal wear, we eat food (usually either really good or really bad, no in-betweens), listen to some speeches, maybe drink some grog, and dance a little.

I didn't go to any balls last year since my husband was deployed, and I really am just arm candy at these things. This season, we have a ball in December and another in February. I have a couple formals in my closet that still fit me, so I'm OK on the dress front.

But this is a blog about bras and lingerie. So what do you wear under the dresses?

One of my dresses is a vintage 1960s ribbon lace sheath. It has a high scoop neck and full back so I can wear a regular bra under it. Yay!

The other dress is strapless and has stretch, which means a strapless bra is a requirement. I have issues with strapless bras. There are some great ones out there for us larger cup women, but I also have a short torso. Many of the strapless bras come up so high on my chest that they show over the top of the dress, and this isn't a low cut dress. I have 2 strapless bras right now, and neither is perfect. One fits well enough but isn't supportive and has textured cups, the other is smooth but a little small in the cup so I spill out the top.

I would like to spend a little time talking about other foundation pieces, though.  They are just as important as the bra. Neither of my dresses are super snug on the hips, nor do they show anything underneath, so panties are not a big issue this time. But they can be. I recall the "date" of a soldier at a past Dining-Out (formal dinner). She had a white dress, more dressy than formal, and was rather obviously wearing a white thong underneath. This wouldn't have been quite as noticeable if it weren't for that tattoo on her cheek. Yes, that cheek. It showed through the white dress.

There are tons of "seamless" panty choices out there now. You want something that won't be moving around and getting out of position. No picking wedgies in your ball gown. I am considering wearing my running panties, actually. C9 by Champion (at Target) has some great sports panties. They are super comfy, stay in place, and don't create any bulging. I need to buy a few more.

There is also shape wear that can smooth out your panty line. I do own a pair of spanx, the kind that goes from mid thigh up to the bra band. I haven't worn it in a long time, since my current formal attire doesn't need it. I also own a shaping slip. It's black, stretchy, and has lace at the bottom hem, just in case it peaks out of a shorter dress. It's perfect for covering cleavage as well as giving a smooth outline. These also come in strapless versions and can have built-in bras.

Of course, there are hose or stocking. I personally avoid them at all costs. It's just a personal taste - I hate them. I can't stand panty hose. I don't like stockings. I'm not fond of tights either. However, if you do choose to wear them, they can add in smoothing the silhouette and help avoid the dreaded thigh chafe.

Oh, thigh chafe. Yes, I get it too. That painful spot where your thighs touch together and get rubbed raw if they stay together too long. Or if it's too hot and damp/sweaty. Ick. There are products you can rub on your thighs to prevent chafe, but none of them last all day.

There is a new solution for thigh chafe that doesn't involve panty hose or tights. I plan to get at least 1 pair before my ball in December. Bandelettes are like the lacy top of stockings without the rest of the stocking. I discovered them through Braless In Brazil's review. I'm not one to let them show under my short shorts, but they would be great for a ball, or even under a skirt in the hot, sweaty summer months. Yes, I definitely need a couple pairs.

They have a simple size chart. You just measure your thigh at the point where they need chafe protection, and pick the letter that fits your measurement. In my lack of shame, I will tell you that the widest part of my thigh is 23 inches. That puts me in a B. And since they have the original black and nude options on sale right now..... yes. Going shopping.

So, my under-dress ball essentials? A good (or at least decent) bra, comfy panties (don't want to be picking a wedgie all night), and now, Bandelettes. What are your essentials?

Review: Adore Me & Paili/Arabella

Whew! This review has been a little rough just getting to this stage.

I had previously read a blog post/review of Adore Me by the Lingerie Addict (read it here), so I had some expectations going into this, but I saw an add for your first set for only $20 and had to give it a try.

I knew that the bras in my size were all from Affinitas, so I looked at some of my go-to sites for reviews. It took me all day to decide, but I ordered the Kimberly bra and panty set (Adore Me calls it the Leona).

Now, when you sign up, you only get the $20 set if you register for the VIP membership, which is where they charge your card each month and you get to pick some lingerie. They send you an email before charging, so you can choose to skip a month.

Ok, ok. I signed up. I went with slow shipping because it's free and I'm cheap.


Then I got this in the mail:

box is a little beat up

but it's all "pretty". i hate pink.

I knew about the relabeling. Of course that's the first thing I checked out. I was shocked at how poorly and obviously it was done.

sewn right on top

you can see where they cut out the old tag

they think the sticker there is sneaky. i guess 

old tag fibers

I really expected more, but oh well. I tried it on. I had ordered up a cup size based on the reviews on other sites. By the way, Adore Me uses US sizing, and goes up to an I, so that's what I got.

The set is adorable. I love pinstripes. The fit, on the other hand, was horrid. The band was too tight and I was spilling out everywhere. *Le Sigh*

Failed attempt. I went online and found the exchange page. It was actually really easy. I filled out a little form, got a printable return mailing label, and got an email with a code to get another set for free. So ease of use has been pretty good.

I picked the Arabella set for my next try, or Paili as they call it (is that even a real name?). I went up to a 34I, so up one band and another cup. Time to wait again.

The box was beat up again, and filled with pink tissue paper again. The tags were much better and look like they were done by the manufacturer.

The fit is, well, it's OK. The 34 band is a little loose, and the cups *barely* fit my boobs, but it fits enough for $20. The girls are a little wider than I'm used to, and the textured cups show under thin and/or light colored fabrics, but it looks good under a dark tshirt.

The panties are super comfy! And sexy, with their see-through back side. I will totally wear them even without the bra. 

no pics of these on - gotta avoid the creepers

So what's my final conclusion?

Meh.

Affinitas bras just don't fit me well, and if that's the only brand Adore Me is going to relabel, then I'll pass. I got a nice deal on this set, but just barely. If Affinitas fit you well, then yeah, check it out. They really are good deals on the bra and panty sets.

I will be canceling my account and heading back over to True&Co. who now carries bras in my size. And lets you try on a handful and keep what fits. Yes yes. In other good news, my town is getting a Nordstrom Rack in October! I'm keeping my fingers crossed that they stock lots of bras in my size range.

Brand Loyalty?

If you know me, you know I tend to stick with 2 bra brands - Fantasie and Freya. This is partially because they make such a lovely size range, and mostly because they tend to fit me really well. Panache makes a great size range as well, but their bras just don't fit my body that well. Although I did order one of their softcup bras and hey, shouldn't that be here by now?

Anywho. I have been losing weight since I started this blog. I noticed about a month ago that my 32Gs weren't fitting right. The cups were actually too big. I have one 32FF that fit well enough as a G, and it was fitting me really well. So I pulled out the 32FFs I had shoved in a drawer. One of them fits great. The other still bulges a bit on my larger breast, but I have a few more pounds to lose.

So yes, I am officially down to a 32FF. (Disclaimer: I wear my band very tight. It does leave red marks. But I feel like a 34 is sliding around all day. Where was I?

Yes, brands. I recently tweeted (@lifewithRemy) that as a 32FF, I could start wearing 32H in US brands. Then I read on article on The Lingerie Addict (great lingerie blog for all sizes) about knock-offs and design stealing/borrowing. One point it brought up is whether it's OK for a brand to basically copy a popular design for sizes the original maker doesn't offer. I personally like this, and hope the original designer sees that so many people loved the original design.

That all got me thinking about brand loyalty. With as much as I want US brands to offer a larger size range, should I be supporting those companies that I only just now fit into? I have lost 35 pounds since I first started my bra obsession, and I only just now fit into their sizes.

I was never obese, just overweight. I now wear a size 8 in bottoms, but still need a 12/14 on top because my chest is big. If I can lose 35 pounds and still have big boobs, I know they aren't going anywhere. At this point, I don't want them to! I like my chest, even with the trouble of finding clothes that fit. I wouldn't know what to do without them. I wouldn't look right.

After this whole thought process, my heart (yes, that's me choosing heart over brain) says to stick with the brands I already love. My brain rationalized this as well - I'm supporting the brands that I approve of and, hopefully, the brands that are losing my business will someday see that they are missing out.

*side note*
I woke up early this morning to very high winds blowing open my utility doors (outside the house because I live in military quarters). They blew open 3 times between 0530 and 0600, until I duct taped the doors shut. One strip over the seam between the doors and a small strip to reinforce the latch. They stayed shut, but I was not able to get back to sleep. This makes me grumpy. So I got online. I ended up on Zappos.com and decided to check out their bra selection - it sucks. I read reviews on a Le Mystere bra and someone recommended going with the manufacturer sizing. So of course, I went to their site. How could I resist?

Um, yeah. That was a mistake. They told me to measure OVER my bust to get my band size. I said, "Oh, really?" And got my tape measure (and a bra since I'm still in PJs). YEAH. Their sizing says I'm a 36D.

Oh dear baby Jesus. I have not been a 36 since 35 pounds ago. I haven't been a D, or even a DD since High School (14 years if anyone is counting). This was not a good time to visit that page.

I went to their contact email form and ranted: about sizing and sizes offered. Le Mystere, as hyped up by Oprah, offers 2 bras in my size. That's it. Only 2 bras go up to an H cup. Not to mention, when I did try their bras on a few years ago, the bands felt huge. I was a true 34 back then and tried on 32 bands that still felt loose.

So no, I will not ever be recommended that brand. Unless they do a big overhaul.

I will be recommending Fantasie and Freya, because I still LOVE LOVE LOVE them. Panache, too, just not for me as much. By the way, got a new strapless bra from a Panache sub-brand, and for petite women, it is great. Sizing is small in the cup though. And any brands under the Eveden parent company. Even though it's part of Wacoal now. I don't mind Wacoal.

Done for now. 

Review: Cami Secret

I have a little black dress that I LOVE, but it shows a little too much (a lot of) cleavage for some situations. Like the event I'm attending in 2 days. I tried my shaping slip, but this dress has a keyhole back, and the slip showed in the back. That meant real camis wouldn't work.

I desperately purchased the Cami Secret (yes, the one with the HORRID commercial) and brought it home to see if it would work. I've always had serious doubts about this product, but I was a little desperate.

I bought the pack with black, nude, and white. Only cost about $10. Price wise, that can't be beat.

The first thing I noticed when I snapped it to my bra is that it barely stretched across my expansive bosom. I'm also very short on the top half, so the moving up and down bit didn't really work for me. There was really only one position that didn't noticeably stretch the top strip of lace.

Then I put the dress on, and everything I feared, happened. If I bounced at all, which happens a lot with big boobs, the fabric of the Cami Secret wrinkled and moved out of place. Didn't look good. I tried tucking the bottom of it under my bra band to hold it down. That made the middle of it cave in a bit between my breasts. Didn't look good. Next I pinned the bottom of it to the dress itself. Wouldn't lay flat and didn't look good. I finally pinned the whole thing straight to the dress, but it still just wouldn't lay right over my breasts. I could not find a way to make this silly little piece of fabric lay right on my bosom.

Am I just being too picky? That obvious fold there bothered me a lot. It happened no matter what I tried.

I folded them back into the package and will be returning them.

My sister knows a girl who uses them and loves them. She has smaller breasts than me. If you are smaller than me, please try them out for yourself and let me know!

I searched the internet and found Chickies Cleavage Coverage, which is kind of like a cropped, backless cami. I think this would work so much better for large breasts. The back sits at the level of the bra band, and the front covers more like an actual tank top. However, they are so popular that the website is backlogged. No way I could get one in time for Thursday. Also a little pricey.

I ended up buying a new little black dress. It shows a little cleavage, but not nearly as much my other dress. It's cute, while my other dress is more sexy. I think it will work well. I've found that I really need to shop in the Petite sizes for dresses and tops. I had a much easier time in the dressing room when I stuck to petite styles.

I know, I know

I've been a bad bra crusader and haven't been keeping up the blog!

BUT... I have been trained and am now a professional bra fitter! I work for a great company called The Uplifting Makeover, LLC. Check them out at www.bramakeover.com.

What does this mean for you? This means I have even more bra knowledge, and will be learning more as I progress in my new career.

For example, I learned that bras will actually last a little longer if you wash them after every wear, instead of every other.

I learned that you should have at least 3 bras (I may have said that before) but here's why - 1 to wash, 1 to wear, and 1 waiting in the drawer.

I learned that pushup bras are sized differently.

I learned that fake boobs are not always the size the doctor says he's making you. For example, the doc says he's making you a D cup, but he's going by the size of implant, not the rib and chest measurements. So you might really be a 34F when he's done.

I learned more about fitting, like the strap should be tightened so you can fit 1 or 2 fingers under it (lift it just slightly off your shoulder). You should not be able to lift it more than an inch or two off your shoulder. Also, the strap should fit flat against your chest. (no one had told me that before.)

I am uber excited to start selling bras. It's hard for me because I am pretty quiet and introverted, and now I have to sell myself. But I'm going to work hard at this. It will be a little slow at first, while I build a customer base. It will be hard whenever I move, especially if we get the post we want in another country, but I will keep working on it.

I think it might be easier for me since my husband is so supportive about schedules and I don't have kids, like most of our consultants.